I ordered a cappuccino for my Mum on a recent visit to England, and she was presented with this baby’s potty of suds. It wasn’t unlike the coffee that Francis ordered in the following extract from An Englishman’s Guide to Infidelity. The narrator is Thea.
I pointed to a coffee shop and we went in. He ordered what looked to be a litre of coffee foam, a supermegaccino I think it was called. I had Earl Grey. I waited for him to speak.
“I never forgot you Thea.”
“Why did you pick on me all those years ago? You did target me, didn’t you? It wasn’t just random?”
“I did. I picked on you on purpose. I wanted what Jack had. What they owed me.”
“You wanted me as part of his chattels?”
“No, it wasn’t like that. First of all I just wanted a life like his, wife, children…
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Stuart Campbell author 